Breakfast Granola for 4/10/9

Oh, what a tangled web they weave...

In the face of the growing U.S. response, the four pirates appear to have realized that they may have overplayed their hand.

Reached by Reuters via satellite phone, they sounded desperate. "We are surrounded by warships and don't have time to talk," one said. "Please pray for us."

"Overplayed"? Ya think? I can only wonder how hungry a destroyer looks from the business end (USS Bainbridge shown at NATO Pier Facility Souda, Greece, January 2008).

But seriously, Reuters has their satphone number? WTF GUS? Talk about bias. I'm waiting to hear about a correspondent getting killed while they're at it.

Meanwhile, proof that we're not dealing with the sharpest knives here...

In Somalia's Haradheere port, an associate of the pirates said they were armed and ready to defend themselves.

"Our friends are still holding the captain, but they cannot move, they are afraid of the warships," he said. "We want a ransom and, of course, the captain is our shield. The warships might not destroy the boat as long as he is on board."

You may want a ransom, but what you really need to think about is not getting blasted. To quote Wendy Williams, "So Negroidian!"

UPDATE (0710): Wendy Williams says, "You stupid Negro!"

"We are not afraid of the Americans," one of the pirates told Reuters by satellite phone on behalf of the gang holding Phillips far off the Somali coast in the Indian Ocean.

"We will defend ourselves die horribly if attacked."

Fixed! =D

[Andrew Mwangura, coordinator of the East African Seafarers' Assistance Program that monitors the region's seas, says] "They will release the captain, I think, maybe today or tomorrow, but in exchange for something. Maybe some payment or compensation, and definitely free passage back home."

Sorry Andy, but ransom is the sort of nonsense that got us to where we are today.

The ultimatum that needs to be sent: surrender or die.