Change of address?

The final missive of Hawtness:

Hey dudes and dudettes, it’s time things come to a close at ol’ Hawtness.com. But, have no fear ALL IS NOT LOST! You’ll find all the old content, and new updated content at Tease.TheDailyWh.at. Brian, the captain of the good ship tease, will be keeping you guys in stitches and boobies. What more could you ask for? And (and it’s a big and) you won’t be subjected to my dumb rantings anymore! WOO!
Alright everyone, I’ll keep this short. Peace out!

-Joe Hawtness

One final goodbye, thank you again for all your kind words and comments, not to mention the unkind words and irreverent videos and links! I’ll still be puttering around the internet and you’ll see me yelling about something from time to time. Also, anyone who wants can follow me on twitter. I’m sure I’ll be finding terrible things to share with the world and linking them there. Thanks everyone, it was a long, weird trip.

And now, for something completely different…

This is the only way soccer could be palatable. From Hawtness:

Lust

As told on Hawtness, "The Deadliest of Sins."

But Lust was also arguably the most dangerous Homunculi on Full Metal Alchemist, who this cosplayer is portraying.

Split that with you?

Hawtness asks, "How is that comfortable?"

A: I don't care. That's London Andrews.

Weights & measures

Is it any coincidence that Katy Perry keeps being featured in animated form? Didn't think so either.

Found on Hawtness.

This just in!

But then, it's never been "out," has it?

Found on Hawtness.

UPDATE (1012): Target identifiers have pinned this down to Kristina Rose. You're welcome!

Breakfast Granola for 2/15/11

In case you missed it, Valentine's Day can be tasty and delicious. Here's a candy heart to prove it.

Found on Hawtness.

Breakfast Granola for 1/14/11

Well well well, if it isn't Mrs. Dr. Monarch, aka Queen Etherea, aka Lady Au Pair, aka Charlene, aka Dr. Girlfriend, aka Dr. Ex-Girlfriend, aka Dr. Fiancée, aka Dr. Wife.

Found on Hawtness.

Every Comic Con features...

...this. Forget what you heard, act like you know.

Found on Hawtness.

Gay marriage: not all bad

see more Hawtness

Out there somewhere...

...is one lucky United States Marine Corps lance corporal.

Found on Hawtness.

Target identified

Though Hawtness doesn't say who this is, I happen to know: it's the soon-to-be-former Mrs. Kelsey Grammer, Camille Donatacci. I don't know if she's famous for anything else, but she was a pretty prolific model for Playboy.

This was from one of their News Stand Specials, and if memory serves there should also be a nice frontal where she's hitchhiking away from her bricked Miata.

Monocle smile!

I've never been a fan of Old Spice, but the Isaiah Mustafa commercials were funny as hell. But what if there was a female version? Page 3 of the Sun -- found on Hawtness -- takes a poke at it with the help of Rosie Jones...

Bustin' melons

As Warren Sapp would say, "Where they do that at!?" Wait for it: 0:45...



Found on Hawtness.

Lift

A pretty woman in a dirndl who enjoys the big mug of beer is why Oktoberfest needs to happen year-round.

Found on Hawtness.

More from Hawtness...

I didn't figure Miranda Lawson to be one of the very possible cosplays, but I think this one turned out OK.

Found via this Hawtness post.

Freshly defined

This certainly brings new meaning to getting taken behind the woodshed.


see more Hawtness

To counteract that FAIL...

Football Season approaches, which means Beer Season approaches. I thereby humbly request a new opener...



Found on Hawtness.

I'd watch Twilight if...

...it were like this:



Found on Hawtness.

Breakfast Granola for 7/6/10

Happy post-Independence Day! Now, back on your heads.

Unidentified on Hawtness, but I do believe that is Tori Black.