Question for al-Jeff...

Oh, Great Prophet al-Jeff, is this product halal?



Found via io9 on Time.

Too bad those aren't brains, honey

Sorry, dear, this only means you're an overpriced whore.

"Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks," proved on Holy Taco.

Breakfast Granola for 5/28/10

This is how LOST should have ended.

Found via io9 on Nedroid's Twitpics.

Mmm...cake

Hourglass

Nice shape, couldn't resist.

Found on Funtasticus; Wendy Combattente is also in that stack.

Motion Dynamics at its best!

Congrats to Cupkates

The Sister-person passed along an article from Forbes: -- America's Most Wired Lunch Trucks -- starring our favored supplier of cupcakes:

For lunch truck owners, social media isn't a trendy gimmick, it's a serious business tool.

From the get go, Kate McEachern used Twitter, Yelp and Facebook to advertise her Cupkates truck, which sells gourmet cupcakes. Cupkates currently has 5,000 followers on Twitter and Facebook. "Social media is a huge part of our marketing strategy, if not the principle tenant," McEachern says.

In addition to providing updates on the truck's daily stops, McEachern says social media tools give her instant customer feedback. "It's helped us get better and sharper. You have to listen to what people are saying," she says. "You have to take everything on Facebook and Twitter as an honest assessment."

For example, after customers tweeted that the lines at the cupcake truck were getting too long, McEachern started taking pre-orders.

Social media tools also allow McEachern to quickly poll customers on new cupcake flavors. Salted caramel won recently.

McEachern says it's gotten to the point where Cupkates "customers answer other customers' questions, like ambassadors for the company" on Twitter, Facebook and Yelp. "I'm not sure what we would do if Facebook and Twitter collapsed tomorrow," she says.

Breakfast Granola for 5/27/10

Our LOST angst is justified: io9 has a report card of 50 questions that went unanswered. A quick 10 that caught my eye:

[....]

2. How come the island heals people? Why does it heal them selectively? UNANSWERED

[....]

10. Was that the Smoke Monster telling Ben and Locke to move the island, back in season four? If so, why did Smokey want the island moved? What did moving the island accomplish exactly? UNANSWERED

11. Why was Libby in the same mental hospital as Hurley? What's her deal exactly? UNANSWERED

[....]

14. What was so special about Walt? No, really. They made a big deal out of it and everything. UNANSWERED

[....]

16. Why is Aaron so important? Why wasn't Kate supposed to raise him? UNANSWERED

[....]

18. What was the Dharma Initiative really up to on the island? What was their ultimate goal? UNANSWERED

Why did the Hanso Foundation regard the Dharma Initiative as a failure? UNVERIFIED

[....]

21. In the "flash-sideways" universe, the island is under water. When exactly did this happen? UNANSWERED

[....]

23. Why did Ben and Widmore hate each other quite so much? Why couldn't Ben just shoot Widmore in the face that one time when Ben came into Widmore's bedroom? UNANSWERED

[....]

26. How did Richard and the Others decide whom to recruit from among the various people who came to the island after that? UNANSWERED

What was the deal with all those lists? UNANSWERED

The lists weren't lists of Candidates, since the Others didn't try to recruit Sawyer or Jack. So what were they? UNANSWERED

[....]

35. What was the deal with Pierre Chang having so many wacky pseudonyms? UNANSWERED

They're all quite good questions, and most all of them quite unanswered. The LOST finale remains very unsatisfying to me.

Ace in the hole

Originaly found on Hawtness, fixed with photoshoopery.

In the distant future, robots will look like this

At least, they'll have the appearance of Christina Hendricks for Broken Bells' video "The Ghost Inside."

And I, for one, welcome our busty mechanical overlords.

Found on io9.

Snowbunny

While wandering the intergoogles, I found this. Never a fan of snow or snowsports -- and Snow Trails is apparently some dump in Ohio (as if Ohio wasn't bad enough on its own, it freakin' SNOWS there, too) -- but this little snowboard babe has awesome legs. And that's all right.

Found on On The Snow.

Breakfast Granola for 5/26/10

I've always been impressed with Jennifer Love Hewitt's shape, but this dress really shows it off. Chow down, kids. It's crispy hips on a soggy Wednesday.

Found on Hollywood Tuna.

The future is in your hands

Jeff is a teacher?

Found on Failblog.

Breakfast Granola for 5/25/10

It's only a week until June and we're still getting rain. Oh, summer...where art thou? Send me the sun and lots of these.

Emma Taylor was found on Busted Coverage.

LOST: Major Spoiler!

The Ninth & Tenth Decrees of Simmslam

Forgiveness cannot exist without sin. Therefore, thou shalt vieweth of the camwhores and pr0nz. Many times. A lot.

Also, a happy office is a sad al-Jeff. You go away.

Basketball is teh suck

Feeling horny?

According to the (translated) description:

Aparicio lost his footing on the killing stroke, and trying to get up, the bull was after him, hitting him squarely in the neck, sticking through the throat and piercing out the mouth.

Wait for it: 0:06...



Pardon my Hawaiian, but fuck all that. You're supposed to use one of these and some of these to hunt one of those. Dummy.

Found on Media Take Out.

Breakfast Granola for 5/24/10

Six seasons of LOST, and the question nobody asked was, "Do they allow smoking in heaven?"

Found on io9.